Thursday, January 5, 2012

New Year's resolutions for the King 504 streetcar

While it was most thoughtful and kind of the TTC to provide free service on New Year’s Eve, within a few scant hours the Better Way was back to business – and riders were slapped with a ten cent fare hike. 
What’s the extra dime for? Apparently, just to maintain the status quo.  We interpret this as meaning some semblance of service. And so here are a few New Year’s resolutions for my good friend, the King 504 streetcar:

I will at least TRY to arrive on time.

I will not arrive in bunches of two or three or more, like a gang of chicks going to the can.

I will not short-turn at the last minute at Gerrard or York Street, especially in the freezing rain or sweltering heat.

I will not pull away from a panicky passenger who has just risked their life by sprinting across a busy intersection. No, I will wait for ALL my passengers to board before I shut my doors – just as many of them wait for moi.

I will avoid being on the road, yet curiously “Not In Service”. That’s just mean.

I will co-operate and play nice with apps such as Rocket Radar and TTC Navigator and not make them look like idiots.

When potential users get sick of waiting for me and decide to walk or take a cab, I will not finally glide by with a smirk on my headlights.

If riders are waiting for a delayed eastbound 504, the westbound 504 will not tease them by arriving just across the street … over and over and over again. And vice versa.

As difficult as it is to admit, I am NOT Harry Potter’s Knight Bus. Muggles can ride, and don’t need to wave a magic wand. Obstacles will not jump out of my way.

If I break any of these resolutions, I will remember that I can be replaced by a ridiculous gondola.

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